anonymous-writer Anonymous Writer

Let me touch the sky, have a sleepover with the stars and a deep conversation with the moon. Because feelings need to be clarified, thoughts need to be expressed and words are the connection between distanced hearts.


#21 in Поезия Всех возростов.

#poetry #moon #anger #english #sadness #happiness #stars #feelings #emotions #night #thoughts #newwriter #anonymous #obsessivethoughts #anonymouswriter #103366
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Sweet whispers

Wish that I could start again

but we know I would fail again

I would do the same thing again

repeat and repeat all over again.


I know the sun rises every day

even if we can't see it's true colors

"this time I will make it" I say

but I find it so hard to fly, to try.


Giving up seems so easy

but my thoughts keep being noisy

How do I mute them?

How to sleep with them?


There's a part in me

who wants to keep trying

who wants to keep fighting

who wants to walk even when it's raining.


I hear whispers in my ears

it repeats and repeats

it fails and fails

it's words are sweet


Should I hear?

Should I keep in silence?

Should I follow them?

Should I start over again?

4 октября 2022 г. 22:22 5 Отчет Добавить Подписаться
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M Midnight
This piece of art describes me right now
Fatima Said Fatima Said
Heyyy :) I'm a poet myself and sometimes I wish people would comment on my poems, so in hope you'd like the same I'll tell you whatever improvements I see are possible! You see the sense in the poem is the most important part (and you nailed that part completely!), but when the rhymes are always there and the metrum too it'll let itself be read like honey, so perhaps try choosing one which you see fit. And about the rhymes - don't focus on them too much but you should have an idea of where you rhymes will be. Personally I prefer to write a word in the second verse that rhymes with the one in the fourth. That way the end of a poem will always not leave abruptly but sort of fade away. If you're not sure, you can maybe check out my poems I've published on this platform and feel free to leave a comment too! ^^ After all, there is always room for improvements! ;D Fatima ♡
LJ Lynette Joy
I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~

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