It was 31st October when I went into a haunted house for the spooky spirit. We went on a little rolocoaster ride on the floor. Spiders and bats made out of cardboard came popping out. Of course I had to get jumpscared every time! Even though everyone else was screaming I got jumpscared. The ride was moving slow too so it made that alot worse when spiders and bats came out. I just really hate it especially that it's Halloween today.. I thought the ride was slowing down to I unclipped my belt but suddenly the ride started to speed up so I flung out of my seat; it left me behind.. I was screaming stop as it rode past as fast as a cheetah sprinting. I was crying too! I turned round to see what was around me and..
Спасибо за чтение!
Oh god, my worst nightmare: Falling off an amusement ride *shudder* this start was fantastic! Something that ought to have been nothing but fun, but in reality, it turns out to be frightening. The main character miscalculates and thinks that she's safe, and this leads to something unexpected...
The Punctuation/grammar wasn't great, it had quite a lot of errors. The chapter names isnt good in my opinion, because at the last chapter it has to spoil the ending by namin the end chapter "Death" which spoils the end. Pretty decent descripive language, it was pretty gripping and pretty scary. However, I was a bit confused where the character was at the start. Sure in a roller coaster, but is it indoors or outdoors? There could be more descriptive language, but good job!
Amazing chapter! The blend between surreal horror, then plain and normal life, only to then merge back into horror - very well written! The poor main character hardly has time to breathe. The tentacles were creepy already, but the way the pink girl's face begins to change...spooky!
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