Everyday of my life since I’ve been with you have been hectic...... I love you with all my heart, body and soul; I thought you feel the same way about me but I was so wrong. You throw it away like it was nothing; I didn’t matter to you.... that’s how you make me feel since the moment I saw the messages on your phone..... from that moment I started trying harder than ever before to make you happy but each time I try you push me away farther and farther. What I should have done is truly give up on us; on you because there's nothing more I can possible do; have put up with everything, abusing me, making me cry, making me feel like I am nothing, making me feel like I am going to go insane, making me hate my self and regretting everything that’s we have been through. All I wanted was for you to work with me with every problem that we have, all I wanted was for you to be there when I wanted you to but no you were never interested, we were supposed to be a term and work together at all times. What did I do that’s so bad that you hate me so much you choose to hurt me in that way!? I try to understand every day that goes by but I still don’t understand.
Now after so many months of pain and heartache you just want me to pretend like nothing never happened and make things go back to normal! How can a person do that! I am not a robot, I have feelings and what you made me feel for the past few months was extremely stressful; I have never felt so much stress when I am in a relationship so that’s why I am thinking that something must be wrong.
I am really tired of trying to figure out what’s the matter and even though you are ready to tell me what was wrong I really don’t want to know anymore.... you hurt me so much that I just completely give up on everything that I was fighting for. I truly love you and that won’t change but you hurt me so much that it decreases and there’s no way to increase it again or maybe I don’t want to because I am tired of getting hurt over and over again
You make me hate you .....I can’t trust you anymore...... the feeling that I always have when I see you is slowly slipping away and now you’re asking me to marry you! Yes that’s all I want; to get married have a beautiful home and family.... a man who would love me for the rest of his life but you’re not that man because you don’t have a clue what you want..... you have it all and throw it away like it means nothing to you. I have gave you your chance numerous of times to prove that you truly love and want me in your life and you didn’t... you just continue to ruin everything.
Well now I'm so tired of it.... I am putting everything in GOD hands so anything that is meant to happen will happen.
Merci pour la lecture!