His hands caressed my body, touching me, caressing and exploring me. There was nothing in the world that I liked more than that. He held my chin, forcing me to look at him while he made love to me. I met his brown eyes and held back the urge to cry. I loved this man so much that sometimes that love brought tears to my eyes. He kissed me with immense hunger, closing his eyes, enjoying the taste of my mouth and the sensation I gave him. When he released us from the kiss and opened his eyes, they were no longer brown, they were an intense red and I knew very well what that meant.
I turned my head to the side, leaving my neck exposed and he ran his hand lightly over my skin. He brought his lips up to my neck, at first barely touching me, but soon after leaving a trail of kisses from the base of my neck to the lobe of my ear. I let out a grunt expectantly, hearing my grunt, he complied with my request.
I heard a long moan of pleasure escape my lips as his fangs pierced the sensitive skin of my neck.
- I love you, Bernard.
- Rebecca Elise Young, what the hell do you have in mind?
- Bernard Holland is a vampire. You're fucking a vampire!
"I know what he is," I said irritably.
- Ah, so you think you are an expert on the subject, right?
Yes, that was it. Bernard loved me and he had already told me and taught me about vampires. I should never have let Corrie's drug find out about my affair with him. She was a wolf, obviously she wasn't going to like vampires, let alone the idea that I was getting involved with one.
Besides, she had always been very protective. Not that it was a bad thing, on the contrary, it was with these attitudes that you realized how she really cared for you, how she was a friend who was worth gold. However, I was too angry with her at the time to recognize the value of her actions. I loved Bernard too much and just wanted her to accept him and accept that even though he was a vampire, he made me happy.
"Don't even answer," she said, guessing my answer. - I've known you forever. - I rolled my eyes. It was good that she didn't use the “worried best friend who plays the victim” trick with me, it would be useless. - He sure must have put a lot of shit in your head. How he loves you and would like to live forever with you, but he refuses to transform you because he doesn't want you to spend eternity having to suck the blood of others to survive. As vampires are not evil; they drink from the victim without making him feel pain, sometimes even feeling pleasure; leave no bruises or scars; and still erase the human’s memory so he or she doesn’t have to live with the frightening memory of being bitten.
My eyes didn't lie, I was surprised. How did Corrie know all this? How did she know and be so sure that that was what Bernard had told me?
- W-how do you ...
"But I bet," she interrupted me, "that he didn't tell you that you're becoming one of his sheep."
Okay, now I was confused. Sheep? I had never heard of sheep.
- What are sheep? I asked, swallowing my pride. She was right, he hadn't told me about it.
"The sheep," she began, wisely dismissing the opportunity to rub my face that she was right, "are the humans that vampires feed on." Make no mistake, all vampires feed on human blood, there is no such nonsense of “vegetarian vampires”, but there are some vampires who feed on donations of blood donated or stolen from hospitals. The oldest and most powerful do not need human blood, they drink from vampires that they themselves created or from other supernatural creatures, such as witches and even werewolves.
"But vampires who feed on human blood almost always have a small flock of sheep," he continued. - And I do not believe that your Bernard is an exception. When a vampire drinks from the same human regularly, that human will become one of his sheep, obeying everything his master says and without aging, until the master gets tired of him and loosens his bonds with the human. When this happens, the human dies of depression or suicide, because his master stopped loving him, abandoned him.
This was all new to me. He had never told me any of this. But he loved me, I was sure. He certainly should have some reason to hide it from me.
- Knowing you, I know you will not stop meeting him.
"I love you," I replied simply.
- He hadn't told you these things. - It wasn't a question.
- He loves me.
Corrie blew out a long, tired breath. He sat in the chair of his huge living room that was opposite the chair where I was sitting. Her blue eyes were examining me and her brow was furrowed, a sign that she was focused, trying to solve a difficult problem. In this case, a problem called Becca Young. She looked down and put her hand on her temple, as if she had a severe headache.
"I can only think of a solution," she said at last, after several minutes of silence. - You can trust him, but I don't. I cannot stop you from going to see him and if he continues to feed on you, you will become one of his sheep - I listened carefully. He loved me, but Corrie loved me too and she was worried about me. With a sigh she continued. - This is dangerous, you know how dangerous it is, but it is the only solution. The chances of you dying are very high, but I prefer that you die that way than by the hands of a vampire.
- What are you talking about, Corrie?
- I will transform it.
I swallowed. To be transformed into a werewolf I would have to be attacked by one. It would have to be left practically dead. If the wolf got too excited about hunting, I would die. The transformation occurs if the fatal wounds start to heal at an inhuman speed, if that happened then I would survive. If the wounds did not heal, it would mean that my body could not endure the transformation, and I would die.
However, werewolves did not age and were very difficult to kill. Some lived for a long, long time.
He refused to turn me into a vampire, but he loved me. If I survived the transformation, I would be immortal like him. We could spend eternity together.
"Okay," I agreed.
I was lying on the hard forest floor. I knew this place, although I did not venture very much here. This was the hunting and racing territory of the local pack.
The little moonlight that passed through the leaves of the trees bathed my body, which died little by little. My blood stained the grass and permeated the air.
A big, gray wolf came to me. It was Joseph, the Alpha. Behind him came another large wolf, light brown in color and a wolf smaller than the others, its fur a very dark brown, similar to the color of dark chocolate. Christian and Corrie. Corrie touched her muzzle to the crease of my neck. His wolf's golden eyes asked me for forgiveness.
It was an hour and a half ago, I thought, that she had attacked me and none of my wounds showed any sign of healing. I was in pain in all parts of my body. The fact that Corrie and her partner Christian plus Alpha came to me could only mean one thing. They had already given up on me.
I closed my eyes. If the wolves themselves thought I wasn't going to endure the transformation, what chance did I have? I tried not to pay attention to the pain, but I was dying, it was useless. The pain would only pass when I really died. Or at least that's what I thought.
The pain started to slowly dissipate and I felt my body and soul being enveloped by a strange but good feeling, a sense of security. Magic. I opened my eyes and met Corrie's golden eyes. Her expression on her wolf face looked like a smile to me and she started to run around me, occasionally stopping to nibble on Christian, who was also smiling. I looked at my chest and arms and saw that the wounds were closing.
I was changing.
Another sensation came over me. A feeling that I was not alone. I knew what it was, thanks to the many curious questions I had asked Corrie.
It was the feeling of sharing my body with my wolf.
- Bernard, I have the best news in the world! I said to my vampire lover. We talked on the phone.
- Oh, my precious? - he replied. His hoarse voice added to the affectionate nickname he used only with me made my skin tingle in a very good way. - And what do you have to tell me?
- I won't tell you, I'll show you. I'll be there in ten minutes. - I turned off the phone and started the car.
"Rebecca, you smell like a dog," Bernard said as soon as I walked in. He was in his basement, where he slept, and so he hadn't realized the reality yet.
- Get up here! - I said, ignoring his comment about my smell.
- In a few seconds he had already gone up and was in front of me. He carried a smile with him, but soon his expression changed to one of disgust.
- You don't smell like a dog, you smell like a wolf! he exclaimed in shock. - Where have you been getting into? What have you been doing?
- I was turned into a werewolf, Bernard.
Once again his expression changed. At first it looked like he had slapped himself on the forehead, but if he did it was too fast and I didn't see it; as if he didn't believe that he hadn't noticed it before. I not only smelled like a wolf, but I was a wolf now. Half a second later his face was surprised and disgusted, as if I had just spit on his salad plate while he ate it. Metaphorically speaking, of course.
- You what? - he asked. With my new werewolf skills, I could smell his fury. Wolves could smell emotions when they were stronger than normal, such as fear, anger, excitement, etc. But why was he so angry?
- It's a good thing! - I insisted. - I'm immortal now. I took the two steps left to him and put my arms around his neck. - You do not see? - I kissed the tip of your chin. - Now we can live together forever. Nothing will stop us.
The scent of his fury subsided a little, but not nearly as much as I would like it to subside. I stood on tiptoe, as I always needed, and placed a kiss on his lips. Fast. Just to make him realize that everything was fine, even though I didn't even know why he reacted that way.
Maybe it was that old problem. Werewolves don't like vampires and vice versa. Maybe Bernard didn't like to date a wolf, because every wolf has his pack, and that meant he would have to deal not only with me, but with a whole pack of wolves. And the Seattle pack was anything but small. But I loved him. I would give up a pack life for him, where the wolves were a family. He would be the whole family that I needed.
He also lived alone. There were other vampires in Seattle, but he had almost no contact with them, he chose to live apart. We just needed each other, we didn't need our "species".
- Bernard, is everything okay? I asked, ignoring the scent of his fury that looked like it was not going away at all.
He just looked at me and then sighed. I turned my head down, looking at the perfectly polished wooden floor, and that act of mine took another sigh from him.
- I did it for you. For us, Bernard. Don't you see that it means that we can love each other forever? With my transformation I ended all of our problems! - I tried to make him understand again. My voice was weak and low, because of the tears that threatened to invade my eyes. Ah how I hated to cry.
I never cried. Or at least tried.
"I'm a lucky vampire," he said in a whisper so low that, I'm sure, if it weren't for my new hearing I wouldn't have heard it. Higher he went on. - You threw your human life away for me. For us, as you say. Since I would never change you, you found another way to get what you wanted, without my permission and without me knowing - he no longer carried fury in his words, but the smell persisted. He gave a low laugh.
- I was never a woman to ask permission, Bernard. - I lifted my head.
- I should already know that, shouldn't I? - We laughed together and he lifted me up with an ease that only inhuman beings possessed. He pushed me against the wall, holding me by the thighs. I wrapped my arms around his back as he nibbled lightly on my neck, just to tease me.
- I always manage to get what I want, Bernard.
- Mhm. And what do you want now, precious? Alpha of Bernard Holland's pack? - He said with his husky voice in my ear, his breath heating my ear in an incredibly seductive way. I licked his neck to his own ear, my tongue running so lightly over his skin that it barely touched, making him moan softly against me. But even then, something told me that there was still something wrong.
"Since when are you a man who follows orders in bed, Bernard?" - he laughed.
"Well remembered," he said, lifting my skirt and pulling on my panties.
I pressed the package for the hundredth time against my chest, my heart. I inspected it again, to make sure everything was in place and cute. The dark purple wrapping paper with white polka dots was completely wrinkled and a silver ribbon formed a bow at the end, with a sticker written: "For Bernard Holland, with the love of his Preciosa." All done with a perfection worthy of, none other than none other than Rebecca Young.
Vampires are ancient creatures and, as far as humans know, they are just legends. And, in those legends where they came from, there are many myths, some true, some false. The myth that a vampire cannot touch a cross is an example of a false myth, but the myth that they don't like parts of the Book is true.
Well, the fact is, I was so happy that the two of us were going to live together forever, that I decided to buy Bernard a present. It wasn't a real gift, it was more of a joke, but I still hoped he liked it.
I bought a necklace with a cross.
The necklace was all made of pure gold and, right in the center of the cross, where the heart of Jesus Christ would be, there was a small sapphire stone. It was quite small. Same. Too small. Very small. But, it was a sapphire. I had shaved up to the last penny I had to get this gift for him. I came from a considerably poor family, thanks to my dead father and my alcoholic mother, so it was really a sacrifice to buy that gold cross and its blessed sapphire.
Ah, it was good for Bernard to like the "gift" or I would make him swallow the deal.
I checked how I was in the mirror, fixing my bangs and giving my eyebrow a last brush and I got out of the car, the little package held in my hands.
I had not said that I was coming to visit him. I always told him when I was going to stop by his house, but since we were going to start a new life together, I thought it was okay for me to do other things with him. How to give satirical gifts and show up when I want at your door. The good thing about Bernard was that he never locked his door, so I could surprise my surprise more.
As I went up the stone stairs to the front door, I was thinking about how to give the gift. I liked the idea of coming from behind, my hands covering his eyes, as in children's games. Then when he guessed, I would give him the package. Not that it was very difficult for him to guess it was me, but it would still be fun.
I opened his door quietly and smiled when he saw that he was neither in the living room nor in the kitchen, where he could see me entering. I closed the door carefully and went to the cellar door. When I got closer, I could hear some muffled moans. I found it strange. Was Bernard masturbating? I had never seen him give himself pleasure. There are some men who look like they never do these things, simply because they look like the kind of men who always get a woman when they want to, and therefore don't have to do it alone. Bernard was one of those men and it scared me too. Was he with another woman?
I opened the door and started down the basement steps. They were carpeted, so I didn't have to worry about noise.
The moans were clearer now that I was closer. It wasn't just Bernard. I clenched my fists, crumpling the gift package. I went down to the bottom of the stairs.
Bernard was on top of a girl, having sex with her, his bloody neck staining the sheets. Between his face and hers was another man, naked, with his neck exposed to the vampire, waiting for him to bite him. I guess I didn't even need to say that Bernard's mouth was stained with blood. In shock, I dropped the package, attracting the attention of the three.
- R-Rebecca? - Bernard said, immediately leaving the club, wiping his mouth on the sheet and wearing a gray robe when getting up. The man and the girl sat on the bed, the man looked at me curiously, but the woman gave me a cold look.
I couldn't say anything, just stared at him in disbelief.
- What's the matter, precious? - The woman interrupted, gaining all my attention with the use of my nickname.
- Precious? - I managed to ask.
- Precious. The corner of his lips lifted in a mischievous smile. - Doesn't he call you that too?
- Rebecca, what are you doing here? he asked sharply, ignoring the woman.
I bent down and picked up the package from the floor, which was no longer as perfect as it was in the car.
"I just came to give you that," I said and threw the package at him, hitting him in the chest. I didn't play hard and he didn't move because he didn't want to. The packet fell to the basement floor again.
I turned my back on them and walked up the stairs. It was when I stepped on the first step that the woman spoke again.
- Don't be naive. Did you think you were his only “precious” one? - I stopped right away, but I didn't turn my face.
"That's enough, Jessica," Bernard ordered. I had never seen the vampire acting like this before. At the time she fell silent and looked sad and angry, as if she were a little child and her parents took the jar of stuffed cookies from her hand.
I kept going up, but stopped at the penultimate step.
- Did you, by any chance, love me? I asked, staring at my sandal.
- I loved it - he replied and I felt a single tear trickle from my eyes. - All vampires love their humans, Rebecca.
"Sheep," I corrected and finished my way out of his home.
Unlike many other women and girls, I don't cry for a broken heart. I don't actually cry for anything. Thanks to my mother I learned that crying doesn't solve anything. After so many late nights that I expected her to come back, after so many strange men and women spending the night at our house, after so many days having only the remnants of bread made at our dear and kind neighbor's house to eat…
After crying so much, asking so much for things to get better, I learned that if you want to fix something, you have to do what you have to do, not cry. I'm not saying that I never cry. I am a woman after all, and every now and then a tear falls, but nothing more. A tear. A single tear.
And it was a single tear that ran down my face and landed on the tip of my sneakers when I finished climbing the last stone step to the front door of that terrible house. I checked again to see if the wooden stake was in place at my waist. I took off and put my sunglasses on my head when I entered. It was very hot outside and the sun was strong.
I walked to the kitchen and poured some lemonade in a glass with ice, taking it slowly and without haste. I washed the glass and put it in the colander. Then I went to the cellar door and opened it just wide enough for me to pass, without letting in too much light.
I closed the door and went down the stairs, staring at Bernard's coffin. The coffin was in a corner of the basement, the darkest corner and far from the windows, even though the windows had thick curtains that prevented the sun's rays, and the bed where he was with the sheep a week ago, the bed where I lay several times, it was in the center of the room right in front of the stairs. I took the stake out of its place and held it tightly as I walked to the coffin.
A part of me didn't want to do that. A part of me knew it was wrong. I was stupid. Naive, as the woman had said, to think that I was the only one. Corrie told me that they had a small group of humans, but my brain decided to delete that part, I thought he just needed me.
On the other hand, another part of me wanted this more than anything. Maybe it was my wolf, maybe it was because of my transformation that I was now thirsting for violence, for revenge. But maybe it was just my heart. He might even have a group of humans that he fed on, but that didn't mean he had to have intercourse with them. As far as Corrie told me, and as far as I was concerned, the sheep served to feed. Only. Of course, if he wanted to eat all the girls and boys he controlled, he could, but he had me. After all the words of love that we exchange ... Well, they say not to believe the words spoken in bed.
I put my hand on the coffin lid, my skin pale against the dark wood. I counted to ten. There was no way out of this now, not after having gone this far. I carefully and quietly opened the lid.
"Ah, Bernard," I whispered when I saw his sleeping body. Her blond hair perfectly combed and in place. His brown eyes that I loved so much were hidden by the veil of sleep.
I held the stake in both hands and lifted it above my head, ready to act, but my eyes caught a little box in the vampire's hands. I lowered my hands and, with one hand, managed to get the box out of his possession without waking him. As soon as she was in my hands I recognized her. I opened the box, hoping to see the necklace I had bought and later thrown at Bernard, but it was empty, the necklace was not there.
I left the box aside, confused. Why was he holding the box when it was empty? What had he done with the necklace?
'Forget the necklace and let's get it over with.' I said to myself. Well, part of me knew it wasn't me who said it, it was my wolf. However, my wolf was part of me, so it was not wrong for me to assume that I had said it myself.
I nodded and raised the stake again, Bernard was still motionless, like all vampires when they slept.
A little blood spattered my face when I took the first thrust into his heart and looked at Bernard in horror. Not because of the blood, but because of the scream he gave and because of his angry brown eyes.
- W-what ... - he tried to say, drowning in the blood that came out of his mouth.
I ignored him as much as I could and took the second lunge.
I took another lunge just as one of his hands had taken my right arm with that vampiric force. With that last thrust he loosened his grip and fell back into the coffin. Of course, I wasn't going to leave him like that, vampires aren't as easy to kill as many think. Yes, I had killed him with the three thrusts in the heart, but he would return to life by the end of the day.
I lifted his body out of the coffin and dragged him up the stairs to the ground floor of the house, into the living room. There was an electric fireplace where I could burn it and then disappear with what was left. I dropped his body on the living room rug in front of the fireplace for a moment, to watch him. Not that I felt good about killing Bernard, I was not a murderer and I was not contemplating the good work I had done. I was just looking at the face of the man I had once loved more than my own life, more than my own humanity.
"I gave my humanity for you, Bernard," I said to the body, staring into those brown eyes. I reached out my hand and closed his eyes and mouth, making him look asleep again. If you ignored the blood everywhere, of course.
I turned on the fireplace and watched the fire grow, the flames danced. I carried the vampire's body closer to the fireplace and realized something I hadn't noticed before. Around his neck was a gold necklace with a gold cross, with a sapphire in the center. I took the necklace off his neck and looked at it in my hand a little.
What did that mean? Why would Bernard be using the gift? A sign of love I knew it wasn't. If he really loved me, he wouldn't be cheating on me and cheating with the sheep. I remembered Corrie and thought about how I had to thank her. I almost didn't become one of the sheep either.
'This was what he wanted from the beginning. You be one of his sheep. '
"I know," I sighed. No matter why he was wearing the cross, it could be for a thousand reasons. But one thing my wolf and I were sure of: it wasn't out of love. Admiration perhaps, I saw in his eyes how he liked my personality, and maybe he even liked me, somehow.
'I liked it, but I didn't love it. Not like us. '
I cleaned the necklace on my shirt and closed it around my neck. I took the cross and kissed it.
- Ok, let's finish this - I said determinedly. I felt my wolf agree and it felt like I had gained more strength, more purpose, more support.
I lifted the body up and, throwing it into the flames, I saw my reflection in an old silver tray that Bernard used as a decoration above the fireplace. I have honey-colored eyes, but the reflected eyes were not mine, they were eyes so light blue that they looked like ice.
And it was with those ice-colored eyes that I watched my ex-vampire lover's body burn.
Merci pour la lecture!