Chef ran on all fours at almost super human speeds, he was always able to run faster like this. It was his primal instinct, and since he was raised by wolves. He ran down an alley, chasing his opponent on foot, since he was remarkably fast.
The blue blur faded from Chef's sight.
Back in the newly redecorated observatory, Lyla and Baggy sat in the control room, monitoring the mission.
"Take a right sweety," Lyla said to Chef through their coms.
"Thanks babe 😘," Chef responded.
He darted down the alley. He looked to his left, after each building passes, there is a short window to see the street in front of the buildings in which Chef was behind. He could now make out the blue blur. It was his enemy, a member of the Congress of Evil, Sonic the Hedgehog.
"You're to slow," Sonic snickered as he increased speed.
He moved so fast that he practically disappeared in thin air. Chef came to a stop, he was out of breathe. He walked to a near by puddle on the ground and began drinking up the water to re-hydrate.
"Sweaty balls," Chef said.
In the street of the city, five black cars drove down the brick roads of London. Followed by a blue bus that resembled the bus from Fortnite, and a tank. The cars windows were rolled down so there passengers could extend their arms out and fire their weapons. But the tank and bus were bullet proof, and the criminals were to afraid of civilian casualties. They worked in secret, and did not like the attention they were getting.
In the bus, Dooby-Doo the dog, was driving the car. He had used his magic collar to transform himself to the super hero Light Man. Now having human features, he was able to actually grip the steering wheel.
In the back of the bus was Chang, he wore a brown, leather jacket along with jeans and a 'I heart China' t-shirt. He sat in the back, wobbling every time Dooby hit a bump. He tightly gripped his firearm, fearing that he may have to use it. Chang is typically considered that of an ass, but killing was something he didn't take kindly too.
Two seats in front of him sat Unsettling Brad, second in charge, the leader of our gang was Chef. Unsettling Bra was wearing a bush... no literally, a bush. Like that of a military sniper, not from Fortnite. Fortnite is gay, and if you play it, so are you. Unsettling Brad's long gray hair was tied back in bun under his black sock hat. He had his beard braided in two, thanks to Lyla. His face was painted black and green, and he wielded a sniper rifle.
Near the front of the bus sat Weaboo Man, he was looking at his Yu-Gi-Oh cards, which he used as weapons. He wore a gray jacket with a collar that went up to his ears. The arms of the coat were wrapped around his neck, so he wasn't actually wearing the jacket. He wore a black wife-beater, despite Weaboo Man's young age, he was incredibly fit. His silver was spiked all the way up, adding an extra three feet to Weaboo Man's total height, not kidding. He wore a Naruto headband and normal track pants. But his shoes were those high raised sandles that you wear with socks on.
In the middle of the bus was Dillon, in what he dubbed his super hero costume. It was a brown jacket, the insides lined with pockets for Dillon's various knives. He wore a brown and black leather suit, that had body armor all over it, kevlar was weaved into the suit. He wore a muzzle, but it wasn't real, it was just for show, to make him appear scarier. He had black face paint around his eyes, also to make him look scarier. He was sharpening one of his many knives.
"Has anyone ever tord you how retarded you rook in dat ugly ass thing?!" Chang asked.
"Fuck off or I'll cut your liver out and feed it to my slaves," Dillon responded.
"Quit fighting," Unsettling Brad said.
Something hit the back of the bus. It jolted forward, Dillon dropped his knives and Chang flew out of his seat.
"What the fuck Brian?" Dooby questioned over the coms.
"Sorry bro,"' Brian responded.
Behind the bus, the tank bumped into it. Brian, who was driving the tank, got a bit too exited and crashed into the bus on accident.
Brian was your basic jock, he had no special skills, not unless you count being a god at every sport on the planet a skill. I don't, sports are gay. Brian wore a blue Letterman jacket from his high school days.The rest of his attire was just normal clothing. He had a baseball and hockey stick strapped to hi back. He also kept several metallic baseballs under his jacket. He had blonde that was combed back, and he wore sunglasses.
In the seat behind him, passed out, was Jafar. He was also in his super hero costume. It was the same as Dillon's except in stead of orange, brown, and black, his was red, green, and black. The inside of his jacket was lined with small explosives. Jafar had slicked back black hair and a beard. He was an Arabic man and the descendant of the notorious Osama Bin Laden.
There were two more people in the tank. The first was Faggy. He looked just like Shaggy from Scooby-Doo. Except he had pink hair and sounded like a faggot. He wore nothing but a pink speedo. He was covered in tattoos. Mostly SJW propaganda, but the center of his chest was the Superman logo.
The next was Ash Ketchum from Pallet Town and his partner Pokemon Pikachu. No use in describing those two you already know what they looked like.
"When do we get to have some action, I want to enlighten those sexist pricks," Faggy said.
"Just because their our enemy, doesn't mean they're sexist," Brian said.
"Yes it does!" Faggy yelled.
"What if one of them was gay?" Brian asked.
"Well... that's offensive. You can't be gay and not have these thoughts," Faggy said.
"Will you shut before I put a grenade in your mouth and hope you die," Jafar said.
"You can't kill me!" Faggy yelled.
"Why not?" Jafar asked.
"Because I'm gay!"
"I'm going back to sleep, wake me when I need to blow something up," Jafar said as he dozed off.
"He's so racist," Faggy said.
The five cars pulled out into the high way, they were no longer in an enclosed area. Now, the party bus and the tank could drive next to each other now, instead of in a single file line.
The bus and tank couldn't move that fast, and the heroes couldn't use their weapons without killing innocents. Since Chef was preoccupied with Sonic, the group voted to let Faggy out. But he can be even more uncontrollable than the weapons.
"Don't, I got this," Shaquille said in the coms.
On a roof of a building at the edge of the street, looking over the high way, was Shaquille. He stood in his battle bikini, er, armor. It was a metallic bra and thong that he wore. On his head was a helmet with the letter T on it. He sat on his pet Unicorn Sparkles. Shaquille scratched his neck beard and crusty cum flakes flew out an floated away in the wind.
"C'mon Sparkled!" Shaquille yelled.
Sparkles lifted into the air and flew towards the five cars. The front car held the leader of the Congress of Evil, Kane. Sparkles landed on that car. Shaquille held out his hand and the Titan Sword appeared in his hand. It was a giant sword that resembled that of a knight's.
Shaquille thrust the the sword through the roof of the car. The three men who weren't driving, one of which was Kane, opened fire on the ceiling. the bullets shot through the car. Shaquille summoned the Titan Shield and deflected all of the bullets.
"Stop it! You're wasting bullets!" Kane yelled.
"Hitler's Secret Son, where are you?" Kane asked into his own com.
"On ze way," Hitler's Secret Son responded.
About a few miles away was a helicopter, this contained Hitler's Secret Son and his men, which were robo-noazis.
"Guys, Hitler's Secret Son is here, they're trying to fuse!" Shaquille yelled into his com.
"I see the chopper broham, I'll shoot it down," Brian responded.
"No, it'll fall and cause even more damage!" Baggy yelled.
"Shit, your right," Brian said.
"Chef, can you get to the chopper?" Lyla asked.
"Get to the chopper," Chef repeated in an Arnold Schwarzenegger voice.
Chef leaped into the air, over the buildings and out of the alley. He looked around as he slowly fell back to the ground. He spotted the helicopter and teleported over to it.
Chef reappeared inside.
"NEIN!" Hitler's Secret Son yelled.
"Come to papa!" Chef yelled.
The two robots ran at Chef. He jumped on one and made the other smack it's friend in the head. Chef balled up his fist and it glowed red. He did the whip and punched a hole right through the first robot.
"Oh shit!" Hitler's Secret Son yelled.
He attempted to run to the parachute pack on the wall, but Chef kicked him out of the helicopter. H screamed as he plummeted to the ground. Then he was caught, but not by someone good. It was Faggy, he was super ripped, like the size of the Hulk.
"I heard you killed some gay people," Faggy said.
"No, it was just a misunderstanding," Hitler's Secret Son pleaded.
"Your lying! FAGGY SMASH!" Faggy yelled.
Faggy's giant Hulk sized dick emerged from his pink speedo. Faggy ripped Hitler's Secret Son's pants off and attempted to shove his dick up his ass. But it failed, Faggy's dick was to big for Hitler's Secret Son's tight asshole. But he made it fit, he forced it in there and fucked Hitler's Secret Son.
He screamed.
"Oh yeah!" Faggy moaned.
Back on the street, Shaquille stuck his sword in the road in front of the car. It stopped, Kane shot out of the windshield. He stumble up, wiping the glass off of him.
"Goddammit," he mumbled.
Sparkles climbed off of the car and walked over Kane. Shaquille hopped down and leaned to Kane.
"What do you have to say for yourself?" Shaquille asked.
"Nothing, I was doing as my master told," Kane responded.
"Okay, well, you're going to jail... I think. I don't know what Chef plans to do with you," Shaquille said.
Shaquille picked up Kane by the back of his hood. The cops surrounded the two, they all hopped out of their cars and aimed their guns at the two, and the grunts who were exited the five cars.
"Don't worry guys, I got it covered," Shaquille said.
"Get on the ground!" a cop barked.
"But, I'm a good guy," Shaquille said.
"You think they care, c'mon, your team is running, let's get out of here Mr. O'Neil," Kane said.
"Oh... okay," Shaquille said sadly.
"Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos!" Shaquille shouted, then him and Kane disappeared.
Thank you for reading!
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