February, 5, 2018
Our story begins in a dark bedroom dimly lit only by the bright light of a colorful screen. The walls in said room were adorned with posters of anime girls (both of older and younger body type) in tight swimwear groping themselves in an attempt to please the owner who bought the overpriced sheets of paper, along with detention slips from elementary school proudly nailed to the wall, displayed as if treasured artifacts, and a picture of Adolph Hitler with a caption that said "Heroes never die" displayed above the computer monitor, the room's only source of light. The floor was littered in dank and disheveled socks used for socially unacceptable things, along with countless video games, magazines that also laid on the floor, among the soggy socks and dirty clothes that have likely never been put through the washer. Among the dingy piles of refuse were several pairs of underwear. What was notable about these compared to the rest of his clothing articles that lay eternally dormant among the piles of filth on his war zone themed bedroom floor were the stiffness of them. As in, if disturbed from their eternal slumber, they will literally shatter to the touch, like glass. Another ancient artifact that was concealed in his room was a male masturbatory aid. A sex robot. However, it was dysfunctional. Of little importance at the moment, but sort of important later on.
If one didn't know better, one might think that this room belonged to some sort of pedophile or sex offender, which would be false, for the most part. This room did not house a pedophile. No. It housed a legend in the making. This boy didn't look like much, but there was much more there than meets the eye. But that's for another time..
The legend's name is Dexter Sazuke. Dexter was a rather short individual, which he was very self conscious about. What he lacked in height, however, he made up for in intelligence, reflexes, strength, and useless knowledge about mental disorders. He was smart as a whip from years of reading any book that he could get his hands on. On top of that, his small frame made him light on his toes, which gave him the ability to sprint for long duration of time. Quicker than most individuals, on top of that. And, despite Dexter's small size, he was quite strong.
Dexter had long brown, lanky hair that reached his neck in the back, and covered his ears on the sides. In the front, his bangs covered his eyebrows, and seemed to reach out for his eyes, but never accomplished such a goal. A sort of bowlish cut. He had blue liquid eyes that gave a very affable feel to him at first glance. Dexter had light, seemingly bloodless skin. Well, not bloodless, but he was rather pale. Comparably to many other skin tones. And he had a rather attractive facial structure. So, to shorten things up, Dexter was not hard on the eyes. The fact is, if he could gain a few inches to his name, he might even be considered a babe. No homo, though.
After Dexter finished his morning right arm workout routine, he stood up and stretched, while pondering whether sperm cells have feelings or not. Which also raised the question: "If so, wouldn't that make me a mass murderer?". Dexter was a very philosophical individual. He soon came to the conclusion that he was a mass murderer with thousands of kills. He tried to guess his K/D ratio, but then he realized that he didn't feel bad for the murders that he committed, which led him to believe that he didn't have the ability to feel sympathy, which in return led him to the conclusion that he was a sociopath. But he forgot everything he had hypothesized once he remembered that he had to go to school.
He had to trek about a mile in order for his bus to pick him up. Which meant he had to wake up earlier than most other students. The bus driver refused to do her job, which was to go to the varying locations close to where the students live and pick them up. Instead, she made them all walk an unreasonable length just so that they can get to school. And the location she picks them up at? A strip club for the elderly. Not only was it hard on the eyes, but every Tuesday, even if they turned their attention away from the amatory sight, their eardrums would still be bombarded by the moans of old and wrinkly hips clapping. Thus the name, Touchy Tuesdays.
During Dexter's walk to the club, however, he saw a comely truck with a coat of paint darker than the night sky, and large black wheels trekking it's own way, the opposite of Dexter. Dexter didn't pay much mind to the immense four wheeled bull driving the opposite direction of him, until it was nearly too late.
Once the truck got closer to him, it made a posthaste turn onto the sidewalk where Dexter was keeping a brisk pace. Dexter wasn't expecting the sudden turn on the driver's part, but he was keen enough to NOT get himself flattened. He promptly dove towards the grass, the vehicle flying by him, as if it were a black bullet speeding by his head, missing only by the skin of Dexter's teeth. He quickly bounced back up, and readied himself for another ramming attempt, but to his surprise, they just sped away What wasn't surprising, however, was that they were yelling insults at him. Weak insults such as "Faggot!" Even if they were anemic insults, however, it still angered our protagonist.
The truck belonged to a certain association that the people of Evansville knew, as the Reapers. This group was a scourge to Evansville. The group terrorized the people, killed people, sold drugs, robbed stores, the list goes on. But the reason they were after Dexter, is because Dexter wasn't innocent either.
Dexter was part of a much less vile gang. The gang was called Satan's Dick Ring, and this group was made up of the only people in Evansville who would stand up against the Reapers. But just because they were a street gang doesn't make them bad. They dealt drugs, but that's about it. So no, they weren't bad people. If it wasn't for the fact that they dealt drugs, they might even be looked upon as heroes in Evansville. Satan's Dick Ring. The only gang who would take on the Reapers.
Dexter continued his trek until he made it to the place where the bus driver would pick them up, where many familiar faces were waiting for the same reason as he did.
There were many people there. Ben, Josh and Dean who were in the gang with Dexter. The rest of the people were unimportant. Dexter never spoke to them. In fact, Dexter was only friends with Josh. He saw the others as acquaintances.
Josh looked equivalent to a teenage Mr. Potato head. He was a corpulent teenage boy with a face shaped like a potato. A very symmetrical potato, but a potato nonetheless. His face was covered in acne, which also added to his grisly appearance. His hair was very abbreviated on all sides, apart from the top of his head where it remained long, and his bangs, which hung down to his eyes when his hair wasn't gelled up. When it was gelled up, however, he gelled his bangs to the right. He wore brunet glasses which held cerulean eyes under the lenses. Probably the only attractive thing about him. He was mostly seen wearing a black collared jacket, which eventually became something that he was known for.
"Hey.", Dexter spoke, waving to his friend.
"Hey, what's up?", Josh bellowed like a bull as he turned around to greet Dexter.
This was the legend number two.
Dexter filled Josh in about the run-in that he had with the bull as they waited on the bus driver. And before long, a lengthy yellow vehicle swerved it's way over to the kids, nearly hitting most of them.
Everyone tentatively boarded the transportive unit that was made pernicious by the driver. What made the bus ride so pernicious? The bus driver was blind. And to make the situation even more pernicious then it already was, she had no arms or legs. How she used the pedals remained a mystery for all eternity. And how she got the bus from point A to point B every school day was the same case.
They made their way to school without incident. Only a few squirrels now stuck in the grill of the bus, but nothing worrisome.
Josh and Dexter made their way off of the bus and into school without a problem. Once they got inside they sat down at their usual table, where a rather confused looking boy sat. This boy was Geyboi Harry. The gayest of all the boys. The reason for the rude nickname is because he was a spitting image of Harry Potter. That's where the Harry part came from at least. The Gey part came from his abnormal carnal practices, which include shoving the barrels of tanks up his ass, and smearing honey on his dick, then letting bees sting it. Yes, this Boi is they Geyest of all the Bois because he likes tank dick and bee dick. His free time was completely taken by playing World of Tanks and watching the Bee Movie in every language. Fun fact, he had memorized the entire movie script in every language known to man.
"Hey GeyBoi Harry", whooped Dexter as he sat down.
"Hey, man.. C'mon I'm not gay....I only touched a guy's dick once, and it was a dare.", GeyBoi Harry replied.
"First off", replied Josh. "The dare was to lick Cunter's dick, and you DID follow through."
"Yea, and I could see that smile on your face as well.", added Dexter.
"Shut the hell up you faggot.", the Geyest Boi called, grasping for any sort of of insult he could get his sticky hands on, only to come up with that.
A jolly sounding voice from behind Dexter called out in a native tongue.
"My mother's pingas! And four times two!"
The speaker was Jimothy. Jimmy for short. A unique addition to Dexter's friend group. Timothy was tall, skinny, and gave off the vibe of a sexual predator. On top of that, he wore a pink body suit, as if it were an attempt to look akin to Pink Guy. Nobody ever brought it up though. As for the autistic sentence? That was in another language known to Jimothy's friends as Jimithonian. Everyone in the gang fluently spoke it. The autistic sentence translated to "Hah! You touched Cunter's Dick!"
At that moment though, an even more autistic noise filled the ears of all near Dexter table. It sounded as if a prepubescent man child was screaming "I like pussy" at the top of his lungs. And if you guessed that, you'd be correct. Cunter himself, was wailing for all to hear. However, nobody paid him any mind. Everyone hated him, and just ignored his incessant babbling. It did get irritating though, when he began stripping off his clothes, still screeching.
Once again, a voice called out from behind. But this time it was a cracky prepubescent voice, even more so than that of Cunter's, which is very sad. Dexter was able to tell that it was Rylan, without even turning around. Rylan was a rather, wimpy addition, to this freak show. The most feminine in the group, for sure. He had a lesbian haircut that he shared with the fictional character Chum Bucket from the Mad Max video game, but Chum Bucket wore it better. His execrable hair was dog shit brown, and was slopped to one side of his head, as if it WERE dog shit. His eyes were blue like Josh's and Dexter's, but they weren't cerulean blue. His were darker, and not as pretty. Rylan had an antic personality, always doing stupid stuff for entertainment. The most recent antic was making a Bee Movie CD smoothie, which he fed to Geyboi Harry. Just for shits and giggles. He was also very fastidious and wined like a little bitch constantly.
That would be the legend number three.
"KEEP YOUR CLOTHES ON, YOU MOSQUITO!", Rylan yelped like a squeaky toy.
Cunter continued tearing off his pants and stripping down while yelling "I FEEL IT INSIDE".
"Yea I'll bet you do you little faggot.." murmured Dexter.
Cunter gave what couldn't be classified as a glare, because his eyes were looking separate directions, while drooling. "What?"
"I said put your clothes on or else I cut your microscopic dick off with a butter knife."
Luckily for Cunter, the bell rang. Everyone hurried to their classes.
******************************************************************************** It was now lunch. Dexter was at a lunch table with Rylan, Geyboi Harry, and Mason. This was their daily lunch table.The lunch table was eerily quiet. Nothing much to talk about.
"So, how's the gang going?", Rylan asked, trying to break the stiff atmosphere in the air.
"Chop chop chop...", Mason muttered, jerking off onto a Powerpuff Girls Mojo Jojo McDonald's happy meal toy.
Mason had a single lair of dirty blond, nearly butterscotch colored. The rest of his features were completely plain. The only other notable one was that he had dark green eyes. You couldn't tell they were green though, because he was dead inside, which caused his eyes to look unnaturally serpentinesque and dark. Mason was also an autist.
"Gang things are going well.", Dexter replied.
Josh took a large bite of his meatloaf as he joined the conversation. "The gang's fun and well until you get jumped because of the gang your in."
"Oh yea!", yawned the protagonist, outstretching both of his arms behind him and leaning back in his chair. "Ikusei sent me a message. He wants to talk to us after school."
Dexter turned to Josh, and spoke. "What's with the tone?"
"You don't get called to talk to the Boss unless you're in trouble."
Rylan gasped. "CAN I COME?!"
Nov. 6, 2017, 7:24 p.m.
We process all of our transactions with PayPal. Please don't close this window, and wait until you are redirected...