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Why You

In confidence and boldness, you might be right. But when it comes to love, and desire, and interests, and support... I once thought that she could overcome her upbringing, teach her to love as I love, but she never did. And if I ever asked her to change something or approach something differently, she would for maybe a week or two, then it would go back to what it was. But I was asked to change so much, gave up my books, stuff i watch, music, gave up so much that was me. And I understand that is marriage, I know that. You saw both versions of me. The real me, and the one I became for her. I poured my everything into her, but I never felt that I was the priority. I was a room mate, someone who helped with family, helped around the house, a companion. And when I came to that realization, I stopped trying. And her being bitter about church didnt help at all. I ignored our connection, that draw between us, all of that time because I just knew she could change. Hoped that our child would show her how to love. My daughter loves like I do. But it never taught my wife the love I craved. She might be successful, she might be strong but she hasnt learned how to love the way I wanted. Why you? The bond between us is inexplicable to say the least. We feel the same things, the same ways. Your love is all in. I know that you wont love me less for the day just because I didnt get to the dishes, or because you are focused on whatever worry for the day is, or because someone in your family needs you more than me at that moment. I know that if you have a problem, you would come to me and I would be able to hold you and help you feel better, and you would do the same for me, I would trust you to be able to do the same for me. Why you? Because we can escape into realms of fantasy and feel at home, and be able to make some of those into reality. That we share this love of books, and that it is so intrinsic to our personality we would probably run into a burning building to save them. That we can talk about any topic without feeling ashamed, embarassed, or judged for our demons. Why you? Because i have tried to visualize my future with her, and I can see week to week, but with you, I see what you see, growing old and staying young, flirting and holding hands. Because my heart yearns for you, because I trust you with everything I am, past present and future. Because you have brought out a side of me that was buried for so long, I forgot it even existed. Because even though we may not be able to bring much as far as money, or a good job, or a supportive family, the strength of us together would be unstoppable. Because you make me feel loved, and wanted, and needed, and desired, and ive never truly felt that

Jan. 14, 2022, 7:27 p.m. 2 Report Embed Follow story
The End

Meet the author

Sean Elliot I write mostly because and about my Starlight, a person very close to me and something more. The twin of my own soul. I write mostly poetry, but also some short stories.

Comment something

SW Sassy Willow
It scares me too. I don’t know what I would even begin to do with myself without you.
January 14, 2022, 21:09
Sean Elliot Sean Elliot
I get physically sick just thinking of not having you in some part of my life. And I know, on the surface, right now it is pointless for me to hold on to you like I do. I miss you so much, and I dont know what our future holds, and I know ive said this before but it scares me out of my wits to consider walking away from you.
January 14, 2022, 20:22