If you've never felt yourself die then you are one of the lucky ones. I've felt like that my whole life a part of me died and people mistake me for being numb, emotionless maybe Abit unkind.
But that's not it at all I swear. I'm not unkind or unfeeling towards anything in fact quite the opposite.
I want to be numb instead I feel everything.
The whole world seems to be laughing at me but it's just the voices in my head talking.
I want to die but I can't at least not yet. But I need a reason to stay.
I bought myself a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of liquor. I bump into you. My bottle falls out of my hand but you catch it. I breathe a sigh of relief and I hear you ask me." are you gonna drink this alone?"
Thank you for reading!